Dust is constant, and tonight, our senior reporter, Prof. Biggy soundy,a.k.a kaka brazza, is reporting live from Nakuru City.
Sources reveal that 22-year-old former boda boda rider and TikTok sensation, Tizian Savage, who became famous two years ago for his viral videos and beauty, is now pleading with Kenyans of goodwill to help him get back on his feet through a Till Number.
This comes after the 66-year-old woman sponsor—who had been financing his lavish lifestyle in exchange for servicing her aging Walls of Jericho—left him in a desert without a drop of water and told him to eat his tomatoes.
The old lady caught him hearing good and massively exchanging body fluids with a younger Gen Z babe in the same house she had been paying rent for; the house was smelling roasted meat meaning they were not even using protection. The old lady cried eloi eloi eloi and chased our small boy with a big tree like a burukenge.
Let it be known that during his prime, Tizian was eating life with a spade, not a big spoon: A furnished 4-bedroom house fully paid for. A brand-new Audi for smooth locomotion. The latest fashion designs and a taste for fine dining—spending 6K on breakfast, 13K on lunch, and at least 18K on supper daily.
Now, Tizian has fallen from grace to grass: From a 4-bedroom house to a bedsitter. No car, no money, no smartphone—just regrets. No tangible skills except motorbike riding skills. The only certificate he has is his birth certificate. Now he is back to riding boda boda.
Let this be a lesson to young men with strong trees—if your tree can save you, at least use your head too! We’ve said enough tonight. Let’s wrap up with a kinangop proverb that says, "When a poor boy gets money, his manhood becomes very sensitive and active."

Kenyans confess on what happens when they are using Ubers 😳🤔

Uber drivers are chewing your girls mercilessly, waaah😭